ALAIN NZEYIMANA, originally from Burundi, continues his new weekly series on issues affecting immigrants in Ireland, as well as everyday socio-political events in Ireland
The Oxford English dictionary defines the verb ‘adopt’ as “to legally take another’s child and bring it up as one’s own”. It always puzzled me why children are adopted, I have asked so many questions but still cannot find a genuine answer. This is because in my eyes, biological parents should raise their children. But as I’ve grown up, I have come to understand the mysteries, facts and realities of life, and have come to accept that not all children have the luxury of being cared for by their natural parents.
I don’t get the chance to watch these days, but I used to be a huge fan of Eastenders, and was gutted when Sonia and Martin decided to give up baby Chloe for adoption, especially after the torturous delivery of the tot. What horrifies me are the complexities of adoption regulations, like giving up the baby and never being able to visit, having the baby’s name changed, and so forth.
Who drafts these papers anyway? Don’t parliamentarians and lawyers have children to know what it means to be a father or mother? No wonder some adopted kids are so bitter and angry with their biological parents when they grow up. In the case of Sonia and Martin, like in many young parents’ cases, it was the sheer stupidity and selfishness of some in the so-called civilised/developed society… whatever word you prefer. If you willingly consented to having sex and are old enough to have a baby, and have the full support of your partner or boyfriend, there is no reason whatsoever to part with your child, because you may regret and carry the guilt for the rest of your life.
People call Madonna’s adoption of the yoing Malawaian boy David Banda controversial but I don’t think so, in fact I couldn’t care less. Maybe there is an element of controversy, but not the way it is portrayed in the media. People say that if the Material Girl wanted to adopt a child, she should have adopted an English or American, and not a Black one. Shocking! Like the queen of talk shows Oprah Winfrey put it, anyone with a good heart, especially who is brave enough to adopt a child from a different race, needs to be applauded, and the world needs more courageous individuals who can save the lives of these defenceless children. Let me remind you that Oprah herself – who is in her fifties and has never had children – has recently done a noble job by building a modern school for girls in South Africa.
One thing worth mentioning is the fact that there are positives and questionable issues in the Madonna adoption case. I don’t think Madonna adopted David Banda because she is such a humanitarian and wants to be one of the world’s saviours.
She has her own two children and could have chosen to have a third if she wished to do so, therefore avoiding this entire media furore. Why, then, did Madonna go ahead with the adoption, knowing there would be fierce opposition to the move?
The answer is simple. Madonna may be the queen of pop and has adapted her style to every generation for the past few decades, but she knows she is ageing and will not rock the dance floor forever. Having tasted success and fame, she is only too aware that she cannot sit back and fade in the background while other stars enjoy the limelight. She still wants to be out there, praised and worshiped for more years to come, and nothing will stand in her way.
While motivated by her hunger for endless fame, you cannot stop yourself from admiring Madonna for the way she handled the whole thing. Her decision to take her biological children – daughter Lourdes and son Rocco – to Malawi proved how serious this woman is. Even if they don’t return for the next ten years, they will grow up knowing there are millions of people out there who are less privileged, to say the least, and most of all, they will grow up knowing that there is more to Black people than The Cosby Show or hip hop music.
Just like it means the world to a child to have parents, biological or otherwise, some grown-up people are also desperate to have a baby in their lives and will do whatever it takes to have one.
So Angelina Jolie adopted Maddox and Zahara before giving birth to her own child with partner Brad Pitt – but that doesn’t give her the right to criticise Madonna for what she has done. They have both done the right thing in a different way and should be thanked for that. One is a movie star and humanitarian, the other is a pop star with a mountainous ego turned humanitarian – but who cares?
Both women have fans that worship them and want to emulate them and I would urge anyone in Ireland who really loves this pair to think about adopting an African child if they have the will and means to do so.
Burundi-born political writer and analyst Alain Nzeyimana moved to Dublin six months ago from London, where he studied and lived for the past ten years. He holds a BA Hons in Politics and International Studies from Middlesex, and has worked for prestigious organisations in London such as the House of Commons and Amnesty International
I don’t get the chance to watch these days, but I used to be a huge fan of Eastenders, and was gutted when Sonia and Martin decided to give up baby Chloe for adoption, especially after the torturous delivery of the tot. What horrifies me are the complexities of adoption regulations, like giving up the baby and never being able to visit, having the baby’s name changed, and so forth.
Who drafts these papers anyway? Don’t parliamentarians and lawyers have children to know what it means to be a father or mother? No wonder some adopted kids are so bitter and angry with their biological parents when they grow up. In the case of Sonia and Martin, like in many young parents’ cases, it was the sheer stupidity and selfishness of some in the so-called civilised/developed society… whatever word you prefer. If you willingly consented to having sex and are old enough to have a baby, and have the full support of your partner or boyfriend, there is no reason whatsoever to part with your child, because you may regret and carry the guilt for the rest of your life.
People call Madonna’s adoption of the yoing Malawaian boy David Banda controversial but I don’t think so, in fact I couldn’t care less. Maybe there is an element of controversy, but not the way it is portrayed in the media. People say that if the Material Girl wanted to adopt a child, she should have adopted an English or American, and not a Black one. Shocking! Like the queen of talk shows Oprah Winfrey put it, anyone with a good heart, especially who is brave enough to adopt a child from a different race, needs to be applauded, and the world needs more courageous individuals who can save the lives of these defenceless children. Let me remind you that Oprah herself – who is in her fifties and has never had children – has recently done a noble job by building a modern school for girls in South Africa.
One thing worth mentioning is the fact that there are positives and questionable issues in the Madonna adoption case. I don’t think Madonna adopted David Banda because she is such a humanitarian and wants to be one of the world’s saviours.
She has her own two children and could have chosen to have a third if she wished to do so, therefore avoiding this entire media furore. Why, then, did Madonna go ahead with the adoption, knowing there would be fierce opposition to the move?
The answer is simple. Madonna may be the queen of pop and has adapted her style to every generation for the past few decades, but she knows she is ageing and will not rock the dance floor forever. Having tasted success and fame, she is only too aware that she cannot sit back and fade in the background while other stars enjoy the limelight. She still wants to be out there, praised and worshiped for more years to come, and nothing will stand in her way.
While motivated by her hunger for endless fame, you cannot stop yourself from admiring Madonna for the way she handled the whole thing. Her decision to take her biological children – daughter Lourdes and son Rocco – to Malawi proved how serious this woman is. Even if they don’t return for the next ten years, they will grow up knowing there are millions of people out there who are less privileged, to say the least, and most of all, they will grow up knowing that there is more to Black people than The Cosby Show or hip hop music.
Just like it means the world to a child to have parents, biological or otherwise, some grown-up people are also desperate to have a baby in their lives and will do whatever it takes to have one.
So Angelina Jolie adopted Maddox and Zahara before giving birth to her own child with partner Brad Pitt – but that doesn’t give her the right to criticise Madonna for what she has done. They have both done the right thing in a different way and should be thanked for that. One is a movie star and humanitarian, the other is a pop star with a mountainous ego turned humanitarian – but who cares?
Both women have fans that worship them and want to emulate them and I would urge anyone in Ireland who really loves this pair to think about adopting an African child if they have the will and means to do so.
Burundi-born political writer and analyst Alain Nzeyimana moved to Dublin six months ago from London, where he studied and lived for the past ten years. He holds a BA Hons in Politics and International Studies from Middlesex, and has worked for prestigious organisations in London such as the House of Commons and Amnesty International
